THE LOVE COMPONENT:
It is an active, conscious choice to value, respect and affirm people without prejudice or judgement. It is choosing to say, regardless of how you treat me, I’m still going to treat you the way I would like to be treated
Now sometimes that can be hard. It means that I have to recognise that I am not responsible for the way people respond to me (as long as I have not been ‘unloving’ in some way), and that sometimes even in my caring, I may still have to put boundaries around our relationship for our my own protection or even yours.
The Love Component recognises that you may have struggles and history in your life I’m not aware of, and those have made you who you are today. It recognises that you may still be processing your ‘stuff’ and growing in your maturity and working through your healing. It gives you room to make mistakes and to try again, and when we have disagreements I’m going to still value and affirm you but hope that we can work together to create a win-win situation for both of us.
The Love Component also considers how my decisions will affect others and I make adjustments to my attitude and behaviour so that I protect our relationship. I am going to appreciate our differences and recognise that you have strengths I don’t have and together we can build a whole. I will endeavour to set aside my preconceived ideas, mindsets and prejudices that may cause me to make wrong assumptions about you.
The Love Component chooses to always move towards positive, healthy communication and relationships even when it feels scary and makes me feel vulnerable and fearful. I make the choice to always choose that we will relate.
Choosing to live my life with others through the Love Component will always have its challenges, but choosing to always respect, affirm and appreciate others, no matter the differences between us, will always reap rewards in my life. My relationships will always be that much more enriching and satisfying and I will feel a sense of belonging and community with others.